Reviews by Kimberly Gottier

Don't Sing Songs to a Heavy Heart-How to Relate to Those Who Are Suffering, by Kenneth C. Haugk, PhD

Knowing the Right Thing to Say

How often have we worried that our words or actions in trying to comfort someone who is suffering may unintentionally add to their pain or burden instead of easing those things?

A must own book for everyone, written by Kenneth C. Haugk, Ph.D., is Don’t Sing Songs to a Heavy Heart–How to Relate to Those Who are Suffering.

The author of this book is a pastor, clinical psychologist and founder of Stephen Ministries whose drive to write this book came from his own suffering along with careful research with more than four thousand people who have also experienced suffering in their lives.

He has clearly provided practical examples and suggestions about appropriate things to say or do as well as what not to say or do when we attempt to care for hurting people in our midst.

Kenneth addresses the challenges of relating, biblical understanding of suffering, care giving fears, connecting meaningfully, body language, avoidance and more.

This book is a keeper whose pages will become worn as you refer to it time and time again.  It is an easy read and 150 pages long.

Passages in Caregiving–Turning Chaos Into Confidence, by Gail Sheehy

Gail cared for her husband for 17 years and on a church retreat she became aware that walking a labyrinth is just like care giving with the sharp twists and turns.  This book also shares actual stories of challenges and triumphs in caring for another individual.

29 Gifts–How  a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life, by Cami Walker

This book, 29 Gifts, written by Cami Walker, made me think of our Caring Ministries group.  In it, Cami says she views “giving and receiving as an exchange of energy" . . . and in that exchange, she sees a “divine experience” or a “God moment.”  Her book challenges readers to consciously make an effort to give at least one thing each day, for 29 days in a row whether it be a meal, coins to a street person or a smile to a passerby.

Having just had the good fortune of traveling in Europe with our oldest son, I know how comforting just a smile would have been from a couple vendors or passersby that we tried to communicate in a foreign language with when we were struggling to find our way.

I offer each of you the challenge to consciously give a gift for 29 days.  Perhaps start with a smile to someone in church each Sunday, especially to someone new among our church family.

In addition to our giving, we must also learn to be gracious receivers.  In Caring Ministries it is often challenging to ask for help when we need it.  But we must remember that there is a blessing not only in receiving, but also in the giving.  You are allowing a divine experience to take place when you graciously accept a gift.

If you read the book or decide to take on the challenge, please feel free to share your thoughts and experiences with me by emailing me at: kgottier22@comcast.net

Happiness in a Storm, by Wendy Schiessel Harpham, MD

This book  addresses facing illness and embracing life as a healthy survivor.

A friend and I attended one of her lectures and we both found Wendy to be uplifting, inspirational, and humorous.  There was much laughter in her tear-provoking stories!  I loaned this book to another friend who found that it provided “practical information with very good emotional points of view . . . and it helped take away some of the scariness of the whole situation.”

Confident Conversations,  by Mike Bechtle

This book discusses how to communicate successfully in any situation.  Dr. Bechtle, a senior training consultant, has taught over 2500 seminars to many Fortune 500 companies.  Great conversation doesn’t come naturally to many folks and this book provides the tools to help make that easier.  I recommend this read if you are involved in Caring Ministries and have concerns about comfortable communication when visiting one of our parishioners.  This book would even be helpful to those who are hesitant about mingling with others during coffee hours after church or other fellowship situations.  It would also be beneficial in any aspect of our lives where we need to interact with others.  It is an easy, quick, and thought-provoking read.

Other Recommended Reading

have a little faith, by Mitch Albom

On Grief and Grieving, by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler

Visit the web site related to Anita Diamant's book, The Red Tent.

Shopping for books?

Shop at Majesty Books and Bibles and request that your purchases benefit our church.  We get a check at the end of the year which we put toward one of our mission efforts.

Books can also be ordered from www.Amazon.com, which also has new, discounted, and used copies.  I am also willing to share the copies I have if you would like to borrow them.

Visit our Library across from the church offices.